Fumes

Just the other day my Beloved commented on the fact that Zeke is now 4 months old. “Where did the time go?” he asked. He followed that up by saying, “Are we just running on fumes?”

To which I most assuredly replied, “Yes!”

I am not sure why it has worked this way but with babies #1 and #3 I seemed to bounce right back into the swing of things. I hit my stride, if you will, after a month or two. But with babies #2 and #4 it just feels like chaos reigns and here we are four months out and I still haven’t hit my stride. Yet. (Thinking positive.)

Part of the problem is sleep. Yeah, not getting so much of it again these days. I stay up a bit late with Zeke to get a feeding in. He has had some trouble with gas discomfort so often times he wakes up more than once scrim scrambling crying out in pain. Thus sleep time is not solid but broken up. Add to that Katie has taken to waking up early. By early I mean around 6ish. It would be irritating but she wakes up and comes down to the bedroom in the sweetest way.

“I waked up, Mommy,” she says in her little girl voice. She has her blanket in hand and her binks still in her mouth.

“Climb on in Mommy’s bed,” I tell her. She grabs a pillow and snuggles in the covers close to my side. She doesn’t sleep but does doze from time to time. What I most appreciate is that she isn’t a wiggle worm. She just lays there and snuggles and dozes. That gives me a little more time to lay there and doze myself.

Someday I keep telling myself. Someday we’ll get on track. The schedule of nursing every 3 hours will click with all else that we have going on around here. Someday. Perhaps on that day they’ll be some actual gas for us to thrive on. Until then I am afraid the fumes will just have to do!

Blessings 61-75

- a tank that still has fumes

- sweet little girls who snuggle in my covers with me

- babies who forget/forgive mommies for ugly behavior in the middle of the night

- older children keeping baby occupied so I can make lunch

- good old peanut butter and jelly sandwich

- 2 hours or so of quiet at home with just baby while rest of family went to church

- Husbandry allowing me to stay in bed when older children got up after a particularly rough night

- deal on cutest little shoes for Katie

- empty dirty laundry baskets

- no one is sick

- my Beloved doesn’t give me a hard time for coming home to find me still in my jammies and not showered

- long eyelashes (all four have them) to go with beautiful eyes

- children ‘seeing’ that not all kids live the way they do through Mission India’s My Passport to India

- math doesn’t seem to cause Kiersten anywhere near the frustration and boredom as it has previously

- seeing that Isaiah’s penmanship has improved from just 8 weeks ago