Monday, February 1, 2010

She Did It Again

I don’t know about other parents out there, but some days I do wonder if my children have unusually thick skulls. And I am not referring to their ability to hit theirs heads often and have it be no big deal. I am referring to their constant banging against the wall of discipline time after time to only get the same answer and yet do that same behavior time and again.

What I am referring to specifically is my children and jumping on beds. You may recall it was just a few short weeks ago they got busted for jumping on Kiersten’s bed and literally busting it. Today while I am on the phone, within my line of vision, a child of mine goes in and jumps on my bed! I proceed to kick them out, swiftly, with a few choice words about jumping on beds, yet again.

So why am I surprised a few short hours after this incident children come downstairs to say that they have once again broken two of the slats under Kiersten’s bed as a result of jumping?!!!

Dear me, what am I doing wrong that my children don’t get it?

Anyhow, it was Kiersten who was seen earlier on my bed and who came to confess later. I had to tell she would be the one passing that piece of information on to Dad. I would not. She became upset right away knowing how mad he got the last time but even more so because she would be the one to tell him, not me. She sees him differently, is in more awe of him and cherishes his opinion way differently than mine. So telling him was going to be extremely difficult for her, and I knew that and used that to my advantage. (Hopefully. We’ll see how long it takes before they jump and break aforementioned bed again!)

She is telling me her excuses, “Isaiah made me do it.” There were other excuses as well and I just had to tell her blaming others for what you chose to do will not go over well for you. You need to accept that you made your own choice and it wasn’t a good one and therefore there will be consequences.

So when she hears the key in the door, knowing Dad is home, she flees to her room. That child had wings on I assure you! I went ahead and gave him the heads up so he had a few moments to process the situation before she came to confess. I knew she was really upset and didn’t want him to be too upset in the moment, if that makes sense.

It took her about 20 minutes I would say (in between I was asked, “Should I seek her out?” to which I had replied, “No, let her come to you.”) before she reappeared eyes and nose red with tissue in hand. I had my back to them at the sink as I listened to her tearful confession about jumping and breaking the bed. I have to tell you I cried for her (though she didn’t know it). It was good for her to confess and I knew it but I felt for how worked up she had made herself.

In the end she had a small talking to, her accomplice included, and then was told she owed Dad $1 for the board to fix the bed. She promptly went up, retrieved the money and handed it over and then was a new girl. Confession does wonders for the soul, doesn’t it?


Margie said...

Awww, I was crying for her too reading this. Sweet. We are using the same discipling method here for Aidan. When there is a problem at school he usually confesses to me quickly. One time he did not want me to tell Dad and I said to him that I have to tell him obviously. Since then, when there is the problem I always tell him that he has to tell Dad then we will work out a punishment if one is required. It works wonders really. We have had some good chats come from this. I also usually give B a heads up before hand just so that he knows what is coming and to make sure to ask Aidan how is day went.

BTW, I have bed jumpers too!

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